As a man, society shits on us daily. We can’t even get an equal job without getting paid 30% less than our female counterpart. It is all an underhanded way to keep us from just making babies. Women have to realize we are not going to wait for them at home and milk the baby juices out of our penises anymore. The days are gone where we stay home with the kids, make dinner, and keep our legs spread for their pleasure. We want to be equal. We want to have the same jobs, same pay, and the freedom to play games without being sexually harassed.

We are human beings too and need to be treated like them. Every time I log into Ventrilo and start talking, I get comments about my sexy voice or people asking me if I am single. I don’t really need a date playing a game. I just want to take it easy and relax like women do. Why can’t I just log on and be apart of the girls without being treated like a personal dildo to all the estrogen filled 18 year old women? I’m not just a walking penis you know! I might have a beautiful voice and know I am a minority in gaming, but I just wish I could relax and play without someone wanting to tickle my prostate.

To all you women gamers out there:

How would you like it if the tables were turned? How would you like it if you weren’t considered for your education or talent? Every time you went for a job interview you would have to worry if everybody was sizing up your breasts instead of how well you did the job. You would know our pain of everyone drooling over our bulges and creating restaurants like Junkers. They could call yours’ Hooters or something demeaning like that.

My point is: Think of us as equals, not human strap-on dildos. Just because I have a penis, doesn’t mean I can’t be like one of the gals. I just want to log into a game and relax like you. I might get told I am equal, but I look at my paycheck every week and see how much less I get paid for doing the same job as a woman. We have it hard enough in society, we don’t need it in virtual worlds to. Just try to take the time to rain in your sexism for one second and put yourselves in our shoes. Think about how damaging it would be if we did the same to you. What if all the guys in the office said, ” check out the rack on her. I would do her in a second.” See how silly that sounds. Us guys, get treated like that everyday for less pay. You would think we would love to come home and game a tiny bit without getting told how you think our penises are huge or how how sexy our voices are. We need this time before our wives nag about how the house is a mess and we need to get back in the kitchen barefoot and hung.

It only takes 5 seconds to not treat each other like sex objects. In the end, sex will be nonexistent in your life and all you will have left is your skills to communicate politely with the opposite sex. Learn the skills early or you will die a lonely person.

10. Jack & Jill- I think Andrew Dice Clay summed this one up nicely.

9. Almond Joy & Mounds candy bars- sing it!

8. A director- if the kid yells, ACTION, mommy might give you a treat.

7. Two girls and 1 chocolate ice cream- please get their own ice cream

6. E.T.- mommy might have flashbacks of work today.

5. A monkey- there will be no spanking the monkey on Halloween

4. A donkey- you don’t want mommy to get excited

3. Winnie the Pooh- it’s not proper to stir the honey pot in public

2. Double rainbows- the neighbors might get the wrong idea about daddy

1. A ghost- we all know a pornstar’s sheets have a lot of stains, you don’t need to show the neighborhood what they are missing.

10. Gobble gobble

9. Gravy please

8. Shit, I burned the turkey! I guess we have to order sausage pizza.

7. Turkey is done.

6. Grace

5. I got a bone the dog can lick clean

4. More breast please

3. I like stuffing

2. Cream pie anyone?

1. I don’t care, white or dark meat is fine. It all slides down my throat nicely.

I’ve been taking a night class, lately. The class is an English course. It is teaching me more about grammar and sentence structure. I’ve come to the realization, my writing is piss poor. I even look at this post and I want to throw it in the trash.

I’m going to take a longer break to figure out if I can improve my skills or give up. I’m not one to give up, but I feel I need to improve my writing. My class made me understand I am not getting better at writing, I am caught in a parallel trap of routine. I need to learn and clean up my act for me. I thought I was improving my writing with practice, but I now know I was just being ignorant to my flaws.

Dear Blizzard,

We both knew this was coming. In fact, it’s something that should have been done a long time ago. I’m afraid it’s over between the two of us. Look, this is the way it has to be. It’s time to move on. You’re not the same developer you once were.

Sure, other gamers would probably say that you changed after you started hanging out with those Activision guys, but we both know that you started changing before that. You used to be all about being different, new and exciting, but now you just fall in with the crowd. It’s almost like you only care about your popularity anymore. What happened? Why’d you stop taking risks?

Nowadays, I hardly get anything from you. Honestly, waiting two years between compliments is getting hard, especially considering that those compliments seem like a half-ass attempt at keeping my attention.

We had some good times, though, didn’t we? Remember Eric, Baelog and Olaf? Oh man, you blew my mind with that candy level. And what about all the fun we had on the race track in Rock & Roll Racing. I spent so many hours playing that game. You took the RC Pro-Am formula and made it into something special. And how about the Dwarven demolition squad in Warcraft. “I like blowing things up,” lol. “Bombs are grrrrreat!” And then you gave me Diablo. Wow, it was the greatest thing you ever said to me. Even now I like to blow the dust off of that game and play through it.

But those were the good ol’ days. I guess nothing lasts forever.

Once you got popular, everything changed. It seemed like you kind of got lazy. You stopped pushing yourself to be better, instead relying on your popularity to get you through. And, yes, it’s worked for you, but not for me. You just don’t make me feel special anymore. At least, not like you used to. And then there was that RealID thing that you flip-flopped on. It’s like you don’t even know what you want anymore.

You see, Blizzard, I’ve found someone else. Their name is BioWare and I’ve been enjoying them for some time now. Yeah, I have fears that they will follow the same path you did, but at least right now, things are still fresh and innovative.

I wish we could go back to how things were — before you got insanely popular. You know, when you still had perspective, but we can’t.

I hope the best for you and who knows, maybe I’ll see you around when Diablo 3 comes out. I don’t know, though. Don’t hold your breath. I’m sorry. You’ll always have a place in my heart.

Thanks for all the good times,
-Tim

This isn’t a sappy letter of goodbye, it’s just a goodbye. Most likely, I will try out Cataclysm a some point, but not on release. I don’t find any of the features interesting and I am sick of the gear grind. Don’t get me started on the poor community that shoves their epeen gear scores in your mouth. The game has become a mindless drum of grinding everyday.

It seems every expansion brings a quit storm. I think I’ve quit before every expansion, but found the new expansion to have features I was interested in. The Burning Crusade was exciting, because it was the first expansion. I bought The Wrath of The Lich King out of plain boredom. I know what to expect from Cataclysm, dang love beads. Thanks, but no thanks this time WoW.

All I can look forward to is:

1. DC Universe Online
2. Star Wars The Old Republic
3. Guild Wars 2
4. TERA
5. Rifts

I hope one of these games can catch my interest.

Hype:

Ok, everybody has tried a hotdog by now. We all know how they taste and we might like them a lot or hate them, but my hotdog is different. The ingredients are revolutionary. It is not your normal dog filled with crap parts or empty promises of nutrition, it is healthy and 100% better than other hotdogs. The company took extra care to take extra amounts of time to make sure everything in the dog was pure and delicious. It might look like an ordinary frankfurter, but it’s not. It took years to develop and after countless feedback, it is now perfected. You will have to try it for yourself. You will be amazed at how different it really is. And don’t get me started about how great the buns are.

World:

A great bun makes a great meal. You just don’t have a great hotdog with out an amazing bun. The bun makes the the whole experience worth while. The bun I had was huge, but not too huge. I don’t like buns that have leftover chunks when I’m done my dog. You know what I mean? You are munching away at your hotdog and the last bite, you are left with only unexplored bun. There is really no need for that extra bun, it is just there to look huge. A bun has to fit perfectly with the meat. I don’t like it when there is too much hotdog and not enough bun too. You take the last bite and you are left with a boring piece of meat and nothing to do. Might as well throw that piece out. Balance between the bun and hotdog is crucial.

Character

Finally, we get to the meat of it all. A well balanced hotdog is very important. It has to have enough flavor to stand out from the bun, but not so much you are left with aftertaste. The ingredients have to be similar to other hotdogs, so you know it is a hotdog and not a sausage or some hybrid blend. It has to stand out from the others though. It has to have different stuff in it, so you can stare at it for hours and be amazed.

The size and complexity of a hotdog is important too. It can’t be so big, you can’t get your mouth around it and it can’t be too long, you are left bunless. It has to be the right size and shape to satisfy you and millions.

Talents/Specs:

Having a great bun and wonderful hotdog, don’t make a great meal. You need some kick-butt condiments to accent your creation. Without them, you are left with cotton mouth looking for a drink to choke it down. The extras make the meal slide down your throat. No mater what you like you can customize it the way you want. You can add ketchup for a tangy exciting taste, mustard for a strong bold taste, or relish for a rejuvenating bitter taste. No matter what you add, your hotdog can be tailored the way you like it.

Conclusion:

Not all hotdogs are the same. What you put into and on it makes a difference. You can’t just poo poo it because you have had a hotdog before and didn’t like it. It takes a lot of research to find out exactly what is in it, but research doesn’t compare to the first juicy bite. Judging before you have tried the hotdog, is just theory not fact. The fact is; you need to do the research and take a bite once and awhile. You never know when you will eat the best dang hotdog in the world.

What’s your MMO taste like?

How many times can you dissect a manifesto? How many times can you wonder what the game will be like? What is wrong with that new feature announced? Why do you love the game so much? All these questions can be answered a billion times and I would still want to know more. The joy of following blogs is, finding out something I didn’t think of. The more bloggers I read, the better.

If you are slightly interested in either of these games, I challenge you to find more blogs about them. I’m not too interested in the sites that are corporate or clutter their pages with ads, I want to read the down-to-earth blogger. The guy/gal that writes for the joy of writing. The person that wakes up in the morning, goes to work, and wonders what it would be like to Force Choke their boss. I’m interested in the people more than the knowledge.

You going to help or not?

To me bloggers are like stars. This post is a way for me to take those bloggers out into space and show them how beautiful they are. It is a way for everybody to grab their telescopes, look at the blogger in space and wonder if the blogger’s beauty holds the same as the beauty we find on Earth. I like to hold these bloggers up with pride and hope everybody takes the time to look at how great they are. Today’s Star we will be looking at is, Game By Night

Game By Night is a collaboration of a couple bloggers. They are so great and fluid, I wasn’t sure who was writing what. Their styles flow awesome and it makes for a wonderful blog. Chris and Ryan (Yogi??) are the 2 geniuses behind the writing. If you haven’t had a chance to read their blog, you really need to before I call you stupid. These guys are very awesome writers and their posts are always well done. Even if I am not interested in the game they are talking about, I still read all of the post, because I learn something new from it. Their posts spark ideas I incorporate into my games and then into my blog. They have a very polished, professional flow about them.

Please take the time to visit Game By Night and leave a comment. It’s always nice to hear from the readers and first time readers. It is always nice to have that moment when you say to yourself, “Awesome, I didn’t know he/she read my blog.”

It’s a great feeling to get a comment from a new person. Make the effort and tell Game By Night how great they are doing. A simple, “Great post!” will do. It takes less than 5 seconds to make a blogger happy.

Will Blizzard squash SOE and EQ franchise again? Even though Blizzard hasn’t announced what their next MMO will be, they have hinted about it for years. Could it be possible RQ Next will fall in the same year as Blizzard Next? Could we see the past repeat it’s self or will it be SOE’s turn to shine? I’ll give you my point of view… Who gives a shit, Star Wars The Old Republic…

(Yeah, I’m going to p0rn heaven for this post. I couldn’t help myself. I promise “Next” post will be more PC)