Scary Booster

3 of the Most Famous WoW Players Ever

Over the past 6 and a half years WoW has reigned supreme in the MMO world. Over those years we have seen some of the best gamers ever, play the game. Along with great players comes famous people. From Elitist Jerks, Noisy Rogues, Big Bear Butt, Matticus, and Tobold, WoW has had it’s share of people that have become famous from playing the game. It’s great these talented people found their fame playing WoW, but you might wonder if there is anybody really famous, playing WoW?

I’ve spent months, if not years, trying to discover if any famous people really play WoW. After billions of hours, I nailed down 3 truly famous WoW players. It wasn’t easy, but my ex-wife leaving me finally has paid off.

I know what you are thinking, Chuck Norris, Brad Pitt, and Vin Diesel are 3 of the most famous people that have been known to dabble in WoW. You would be right, but I am taking it to the next level. A level only a carpenter can quantify with a fancy stick with bubbles trapped in it. Get ready to be shocked by by huge discovery, only Hubble could see coming.

At first I thought this was a child’s joke, but as I got fist deep in my investigation, I discovered he is not just the butt of a joke. He is the hardest working player ever with over a billion hours racked up in game time. He has been sitting on his face playing day in and day out with no break for almost 7 years now.

He is the most talked about player in the last 2 years. You can’t go into a town without seeing somebody show off his epic spells or gear. People are constantly in pure envy of him. It seems he has acquired every piece of gear, spell, enchant, gray items, non-combat pet, and emote known to the Online Casino Zara game. To this day, he is the only one known to achieve this feat. that is why he makes my list. He is one determined a-hole.

What is odd about this is, my mother keeps denying she even knows what WoW is. Someday I will catch her in a lie and find out her character name. I know she plays because every time I get in a pick up group some guy says, “Your momma can DPS better than that while I’m banging away at her!” or “You got one shotted like your mom did, in her eye last night!”

I don’t get it, but a lot of people on every WoW server, has seen my mom. I think she feels really guilty for playing so much, that is why she hides it from me. She doesn’t want me to grow up addicted to WoW.

My mother makes it to my list because she knows how to getting around and seems to make friends everywhere she goes. I feel like she is making fun of me behind my back because some of the people that talk about her are mean to me, but I think she just loves me enough to help me stay away from WoW. I love you too mom and I hope you enjoy your new epic pearl necklace I heard you got last night in the gang-bang dungeon (I’ve yet to find the entrance to this dungeon. Even WoWHead doesn’t list it, it is so secret. )

We all know him and a lot of us love him, but who knew he played WoW? No matter where you go in WoW, you hear people talking about Jesus. He sometimes goes by the aliases, Jesus N00b, Jesus l2p, F’ing Jesus Christ, and Jeeeeesus! I don’t know about you, but I think he is making name for himself. I say, good for him for getting out and mingling with the youngsters.

I’m glad Blizzard has the man on their side. Too many kids need that kind of guidance in their life when they are playing games. So many times I’ve heard players pray during a hard PvP match or a dungeon they keep wiping on. We now know Jesus is there to help. If you need epic heals who you gonna call? Jesus!

I knew you would be shocked by my list. In your heart you know I’m right. These 3 people have been talked about in game for years and you now know how famous WoW. The game is a true masterpiece that can bring these 3 greats into one game at the same time.

I challenge you tonight, to log into WoW and not hear any of these people mentioned. I bet you don’t go 5 minutes in town without somebody spreading their fame even further into the history books. I’m sure they will be talked about for many years to come and I hope I will get to play with them at some time, especially my mother. I can’t believe she still lies to be about not playing even after I showed her the facts. I bet she plays with Jesus though. I’m kind of jealous she gets all the action.

Call of Dad Duty

I like playing games, but I love spending time with my family. My oldest son and I have been playing Call of Duty Black Ops together online. It is the only first person shooter that let’s you play online in split screen mode. It’s great to be able to do some team based matches with my son and strangers. Even though we both suck bad and die more than anybody else.

One of the problem I have with the co-op mode is: if you have people with different Playstation Network accounts, you can’t log them on to play split screen. It would be cool to be able to level up my character and my son’s at the same time. Maybe they will allow it with the new Call of Duty Elite service?

Anyway, my son an I have been having a great time co-op killing in CoD. Unfortunately, all good times come to an end. Me being his father, I sometimes need to punish him for not doing what he is told. What better way to punish him than take a way his fun time. Sadly, it had to be my fun time too.

Sometimes it is hard being a gamer and a dad. When your kids get to a certain age, you can convert them to the evils of gaming and have an in-house playmate. But when you have to lay down the law, playtime suffers for both of you.

We went out to a restaurant for lunch on Saturday at a local eatery. It was a good day till my oldest decided to pick on his younger brother. He thought it would be funny to act like he touched his brothers food. His brother flipped out so I had to step in and tell the oldest to not to that.

That was not the problem. The problem was, he started to argue with me about what he did. I told him to stop talking or he will lose game privileges for the rest of the day. He kept going. I warned him if he kept going he will lose game privileges for everyday he opens his month. He kept going. I got up to a week of no gaming before I got so fed up, I took him out to the car.

Even though I knew taking away his game time was going to affect mine, I had to step in as the father and not the play-buddy. He lost a month of gaming unless he can prove to me he can not taunt his brother at all this week and do exactly what I say without argument. For my sake, I hope he can do it.

I think the problem with parents these days, is the lack of sticking to their punishments. That is why games like WoW and CoD are filled with snotty little kids or immature young adults. It is important as a parent to be firm, but not hateful in punishing.

You hear a lot of old-school patents complaining how undisciplined children are these days and they wouldn’t be that way if we could spank kids. I disagree, kids don’t need to be beat to learn what they did wrong. Showing a child anger as a way to set everything right, only makes that child think lashing out at others is the way to solve a problem. Hence why so many gamers yell like idiots over a chat system when they play games.

Problems are better solved by understanding, communicating, and implementing a plan. Too many parents think a time-out to a corner doesn’t work. It does if it is used as a tool for the child to think of a plan to do better. Most parents just send their child to the corner with harsh words and the directions: SHUT UP!

Wouldn’t it be more constructive if the parent told them what to think of? Being a kid, that kid needs specific direction and a hint of what they did. I usually tell my kids: “In the corner I want you to think of why you argued with me and what better way you could have expressed what you wanted to tell me politely.” Something like that tells the child what they did and what they should solve to do better.

As I said, I punished my son for a month, but I gave him hope to change that if he can do better and solve the problem he created. I hope he can solve it because my game time is in his hands. If he fails in his task, I have to be prepared to accept that and let him know I will keep my word. The key is, I need to keep my word and not give into lazy parenting. All too often, parents punish their kids with grounding them (that is a blank threat that has no specific goal) and forget about the punishment in a week or less. That teaches the kid nothing.

As a parent, isn’t your main purpose in life is to teach your children to be the best they can be? Hopefully, they turn out better than you.

RIFT: Going Guardian

I’m a dirty, dirty boy! I thought I would never stoop as low as this in my gaming adventures. The biggest problem is, I am enjoying playing Guardian. I don’t know if it is the lay of the land or the ease of leveling, but I am having fun playing on the Guardian side. If I hate Guardian so much, why did I switch?

It all started about awhile ago when I lost track of the time space continuum. I went away on a small trip for work and I came back to an empty Defiant guild. The group of people I played with on the Defiant side decided to play other games like, Power Puff Girls and Nintendo Dogs. I knew when I guilded with them that they were very fleet-hearted when it came to game loyalty. I never really expected them to stay in the game for too long, but I did hope to play with them at least once. Unfourtunatly, I am a very casual gamer so I never got a chance to catch up to them and play with them. Only my tears lull me to sleep now.

I rise a weary eyebrow when I think of being in their future Star Wars the Old Republic guild. I wonder if they are going to play more than 2 months before something shiny and new comes a long. I know Guild Wars 2 will be hot on the heels of SWTOR, if not in its face on release day. I am sacrificing my dream of playing a Bounty Hunter named, Dogg, just to play with some of the best people I’ve met online. It is the price I am willing to pay to play with them. I do not regret playing with Circle of Truth (Trust). They are awesome people with a really bad case of ADD fun. I can’t fault them for wanting to have fun in life and play the games they love, I do the same. They are great people and I can’t wait to play Rebel Scum with them.

I am in a new guild in RIFT now. I am teamed up with Elementalisty, Chris and Rowan on Estrael shard. I think it is a big orgy and I don’t mind being part of an orgy. I haven’t had the chance to play with them yet because it is a very casual guild and we just haven’t been on at the same time yet. I know we will see each other this weekend and it should be a great time. I’ve heard they are very horny for me and can’t wait to cyber with me. We are dirty old people!

I’m not sure what my future holds with RIFT. I am enjoying it very much right now, but at anytime a new game can come out and pull me away. I have a few months left on my 6 month subscription and at that time I will decide if I want to make it my first game to stretch to a year, that is not WoW. It’s sad I’ve never played a game longer than a year that was not WoW. I am hoping RIFT is that game. If I keep playing it as casual as I have been and the guild I am in doesn’t break up, I should be good for the year. The problem is, I will not stand another guild switch.

In WoW I switch from guild to guild following my friends around and after 6 years of playing, I was scattered around 4 servers. I don’t want that to happen to me in RIFT. I already have characters on 3 servers and not a single character above 28. I will give up on the game if the people I play with quit. I am a social gamer and I play for the interaction with friends, not the game. The game helps, but a good game is a great start to a fun time with friends. I stop having fun when I have to choose what server and what set of friends I have to play with. It makes it even harder when I have to worry if they will be there tomorrow. So, my RIFT career is at the hands of Simple Complexities guild. If they die, so does RIFT.

Some might think it is petty of me to hinge my gaming “fun” on who I play with, but that is my style. I play MMOs for the reason of who I play with. It is my choice and I love it. Every choice comes with its +’s and -‘s. The + is, I get to interact with great people. The – is, if they quit having fun, so do I. I guess I am like a baby sucking on my mommas teet. The second momma rips the nip out of my mouth, I cry until I grow up and find a woman I can play with her boobies to make me happy. When that woman stops letting me play with her boobies, I get sad until I find more boobies. It is a visious cycle, but a man has to have his games.

In closing, I would like to thank all the members of Circle of Truth (Trust but you have to earn it) for letting me have the chance to play with you all and I look forward to playing with you all in SWTOR no matter how long the game interests you. I also want to thank Elementalisty for letting me join his guild and flirt with his wife. He must know I have a bigger penis than him. Last but not least, I would like to thank River for being a great blogging buddy. Him an I have tried to do so many side projects dealing with games, but both of us are too lazy. From a failed guild to a podcast that never made 1 episode, we have tried to do so much in our minds and never got off our asses to do anything. I don’t even feel like finishing this post with a period

RIFT Community Spotlight

In an effort to kiss major ass, I’m writing this post in hopes I am featured in RIFT’s community spotlight. I’ve always asked, “who do I need to blow to get recognized around here?” I’m still looking for that line at one of those puss filled gaming conventions. I would enjoy the licking line better, but beggars can’t be picky.

I’ve beat my head against the wall trying to think of a talent I have to get me recognized by Trion Worlds. Some people can draw crappy ass fan art. Others write fan fiction that a 2nd grader would refuse to claim. I applaud them for their effort and I wish I had their talent, but I’m prone to bitch about people that can do better than me so I don’t draw attention to my lack of creativity. That said, I think they all suck.

I had to dig deep to discover my talent. I did a lot of soul searching to find out what I could write about that would get me featured in next months Community Spotlight. Some of the things I need to do are:

With those guidelines in place, I know I can be on the next Community Spotlight. With that said, here is my spotlight piece:

Wait… WoW is hardcore, not RIFT. I always get those 2 games mixed up, seeing how they both have 12 million subscribers. It really doesn’t matter to me what game I write about as long as I get famous from this post.

I’m sure Trion will snatch (mmmmmmmm snatch!) up this post before Blizzard makes a movie of it. This is a gem that can’t be passed up. Here are a few reasons why:

I can’t wait to see this on the forums next month. Zann is probably itching to post it right now, but I can understand he needs to wait for more people to submit their lackluster. In golf, at the 19th hole, we call this a hole in one every time. Even if that hole is your wife’s and not Delma’s reamed out ass.

You Can’t Please Them All

If you didn’t know, I’ve been out of town traveling the world. Of course it was for work, but I’m having a great time. I haven’t played a single game in about a month now. It’s kind of refreshing to drop a virtual life and get out and see the real world. This past month I’ve seen a lot. Mainly, I’ve seen how people think totally different than what most Americans think.

It’s an eye opener after being in a bubble of like minded people for so long. Not only am I a minority white guy in a sea of Asian tourists or locals, I stand out the way I act and dress. All I can do is try to be a fly on the wall and learn how others act.

I was in Europe for 8 years before, but the differences in people were minuscule. The Pacific, Asia, Middle East, and Africa is a totally different story. It was interesting to see different cultures in my travels.

It got me thinking about games and how we all demand it our way. I don’t know about you, but I don’t remember a game advertising like Burger King. “Have it your way!” Who’s way? My way is not the same as the million other gamers playing the same game, but developers are expected to add the right amount of condiments to please everybody.

For a game to be successful they need to be tasty, but not too spicy. They need to have the right amount of stuff, but not too much at once. The game has to be a little American, some Asian, and a side of European. Oh I didn’t forget the Canadians, they are just a cross breed of American-Europeans. You can please them with some catnip and an empty Walmart bag. I’m sure I’ll get flack for that statement.

Back to my point.

We live everyday in our secure bubble day in and day out. Occasionally, we go outside of our protected life and see how the rest of the world lives. Hopefully, our eyes are opened and we learn something to enhance the way we live. If we don’t learn anything, we are ignorant to life and travel in our bubble in fear of being different.

I learned a lot. There were several towns I drove through that didn’t have electricity or running water. I saw people that spent there free time working to feed their families, not playing games in an air conditioned room sitting in a $100 chair we consider crap. They couldn’t even imagine what I spend on games a month. That would feed their families for 2 months.

I’m not saying to stop living our lavish lives, I just had an eye opener of how great I have it. I have an outlet to express me life everyday while others haven’t even heard of a blog before.

Life is great and even though game companies can’t please everyone, they can provide a service to enhance our lives more than we ever knew. Take the time too appreciate what you have and when you feel like complaining, just know someone likes what you are complaining about and someone has it worse than you.

I didn’t edit this post to prove life is meant to have mistakes and nothing is perfect from day one.

Social Cataclysm

Let me say this first: I loved (past tense) WoW. It is still a great game and will be talked about for decades. Blizzard is an amazing company and deserves every award and silo of cash they have gotten. I am very pleased with the 6 years I spent in the game. Unfortunately, my time in Azeroth is done forever. Not because of the game, but because of how the game forced people to socialize.

Commenter Love

The main point of a blog is to socialize, write, and get attention for your efforts. Comments are the butter to the blog bread. It is always nice to get a comment that tells the blogger how great their post was or feedback on the post subject. It is nice to get an email that says, “What’s his face commented on your post.” it is awesome feeling to get praise for a creative hobby. Bloggers are the afghan quilters of the Internet. A commenter is the stitching that holds us together.

Apples to Apples

I went the the supermarket last night and I had a thought. My genius idea hit me when I was in the fruit section. I should buy a bunch of apples. You should have seen the huge lightbulb glowing above my head and the classical music stuck up in excitement as my idea became clearer. Of course, I had to act like a gunslinger with the bananas before I hung the bag of apples from my zipper on my pants. Fruit and genitals are so much fun.

Hypothetically RIFT is the best MMO ever

Take my hand, walk with me in the sand. Feel the gravel squish between your toes, as we walk down the breaker rows. Clear your mind and imagine what you will find. Think of RIFT as I take your imagination on a lift, into the sky and listen to me telling you why.

RIFT is a new MMO, but many say they already know. It might be like WoW or some other cash cow, but who cares when we enjoy it in pairs. Try to think of it as new, forget that other game too. You need to think back, before that game Evercrack. Think back to your first MMO, try to erase everything you know.

Shell of a Gamer

Gamers are known to be fat, lazy, short tempered, atheists, compulsive, dirty, and lonely. 90% of the time, most of those things are not true. Everyone of us has fallen in one of those categories at one time or another. Our lives get out of control when we stay too long in one of those stereotypes. You can call it what you want, but they all fall under 3 main categories.

6 Degrees of Blogging

I’ve figured out the art of blogging! Revelations like these always come to me when I have a horrible headache. Today I have a 7.8 on the thumper scale. I’ll tell you why in another post. There is no room for whining in this post. I’ve discovered the 6 degrees of blogging simplified. Drum roll please….

1. Me Blogging: This type of blogging talks mainly about your life. Me Blogging is actually the main reason blogging became popular. People wanted to share their life with others in words and pictures. Midland and Facebook couldn’t capture the wordiness required by bloggers. So, blogging came about.

Developer Strike Imminent!

The pressure of a developer strike has been building after several instances of developers getting flamed on forums. The pain did not stop there though. Developers are getting sick and tired of bloggers pointing out their flaws all the time. One developers was quoted saying,

This is bullshit! I come to work for 12-14 hours a day and work my heart out so people can have fun and relax. What do I get from all my hard work? Bloggers like Scarybooster telling me how I should make a quest to better my games. Who the -bleep- does he think he is? He has a cushy ass job that allows him to bitch about my life’s work all day.

The Imaginarium Doctor Booster’s Questarium

Imagine this…

You are thrust into an MMO. You are in a world of danger and despair. You have to level up to become a hero, but you cannot…


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